New Home, New Haven: How to Cultivate a Healthful Setting After Divorce

During a divorce, perhaps the most gut-wrenching step you’ll have to go through is your ex rolling their suitcase out the door, leaving you an empty home. During that moment and many ones after that, you might feel scared, lost, and alone. That’s okay. You have all the more reason to be gentle with yourself. As we outline in our post about healing from divorce, there is no instant fix—but the point of it all is removing what broke your old life and replacing it to build a new one. With your newly empty space, you have an opportunity. Here’s how you can create a healthful setting where you can thrive after your divorce.

Repaint your walls

You can make one simple change to shift your space’s entire feel: repaint your walls. Your new color will alter the environment—light will bounce off it differently, giving it a completely different ambiance. You can use color psychology to choose how you want the space to affect your emotions. For example, blue is known to be soothing, while a bright shade or orange energizes and inspires. If you want to take it a step further, you can do the paint job yourself. A study from Frontiers in Psychology shows that art therapy in the form of painting and drawing reduces suffering from mental symptoms, including depression and anxiety. If you’re a beginner, don’t worry—you can use a stellar interior paint brand like Sherwin-Williams Cashmere. Its products level out to perfectly even layers and dry to a polished finish within an hour. Picking up a brush and filling the blank canvas of your life with color could be precisely what you need at this time.

Fill your house with what gives you joy

Your new place is entirely yours, so it should reflect your tastes. Sometimes, the first step to creation is destruction. If you’ve always hated the ugly couch your ex chose, throw it out. At the same time, keep the items that still speak to you and who you now want to be, like your favorite reading chair. Once you’ve finished dealing with your possessions, you can find new things that inspire you—or, as the famous organizing consultant Marie Kondo says, what “sparks joy.” If you’ve always wanted to collect Star Wars figurines, for example, do it and then buy a wall-mounted display shelf from the Ikee Design Store to show off your collection. Indulge in the tastes you once had to hamper your ex’s sake. It’s your house now, and you can do whatever you want with it.

Upgrade your office space

Some divorcees are excited to gear up their career ambitions. Others feel reluctant to return to the daily grind. Whichever one you are, you can upgrade your home office space to incite your motivation. If you haven’t yet, relocate to a place with lots of natural light and ensure you have everything you need on hand, like your planner, computer, and accessories. For your comfort, investing in ergonomic chairs will be paramount—especially if you plan to work sitting down for long periods. This article from PainFreeWorking notes that the best ergonomic chairs can distribute your body weight naturally and support your spine. Once you’re comfortable, get yourself pumped up and ready to work by populating your desk with things you love. This can be anything from a framed photo of your kids to motivational vision boards that remind you what you work for.

Bring in a touch of nature

Post-divorce, your space can feel a little lifeless without another person around. The solution here is simple: nothing livens up a home more than adding some nature to it. Plus, you’ll get more benefits than just a change in atmosphere. This list from Healthline summarizes the advantages of keeping indoor plants, including stress reduction, better concentration, and improved job satisfaction. Additionally, you’ll get fresher indoor air. You can get your plants at a website like The Sill, which offers first-rate plant holders and speedy deliveries. Try starting out with low-maintenance plants like dragon trees and moon cacti as an easy way to spruce up your home. It’s up to you how you want your new home to be. Follow the tips above to make it a place where you can heal and thrive.
Article written by Reanne Jonesee
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I won the lottery in divorce.

I am the .001%

97% of divorce does not go to trial  and of the 3% that do go to trial only 1% of that 3% goes to the appellate court!

Well, that was ME.

I personally endured an 8.5 year fully litigated case that included a 12 day trial that took place over 9 months and after all that living hell…(please excuse my french)

there was a FOUR year state supreme appellate court process.

It cost a TON of money, years of my life tied up in court and it nearly destroyed me and my family.

the funny thing during this time I could barely help myself but time and time again other’s reached out to ME for help..

I called my attorney Marty (gutta remember I was born in Boston)

and told him what happening.

I asked him if I should go to law school…
he smiled and said you know Paulette you think like a judge act like a lawyer and feel like a therapist you owe it to give back and help people you my dear have experienced what 99% of people never will… that experience gives you the depth and the breath of the entire divorce process

Full Circle

my personal experience gave me the awareness, skills and strength to help countless others facing mediation, divorce, antagonistic litigation and ever-changing family dynamics.

It drove me to do a tremendous amount of education, training, internship, mentoring and certification and create Better Divorce Academy, author the #1 best selling book, workbook, and the 8-module self-paced course: Better Divorce Blueprint and host The Better Divorce Podcast.

With my team of experts, we blend private mediation with Certified Divorce Coaching to help you stay in control, make wise decisions, and maintain your dignity.

I’m here to transform divorce and create an optimal experience for YOU.

The one I didn’t have 😟

but you can.